Hold onto your shields, folks, because Captain America might need a temporary sidekick…a lawyer! An unidentified man dressed as the star-spangled Avenger caused quite the stir yesterday, not for heroic deeds, but for, shall we say, unconventional crime fighting?

Eyewitnesses reported seeing the man, clad in a very convincing (if slightly ill-fitting) Captain America suit, attempting to ‘detain’ individuals he deemed ‘public nuisances.’ This included, but was not limited to, aggressively lecturing people about littering, attempting a citizen’s arrest on a street performer for ‘disturbing the peace,’ and, most memorably, trying to redirect traffic with his shield – resulting in a minor fender-bender.

‘He was yelling about upholding justice and defending the American way,’ said Brenda Miller, owner of a local flower shop, ‘but honestly, he was just making a mess of things. He tripped over a garbage can at one point!’.

Police were eventually called to the scene after ‘Captain Chaos,’ as some are now calling him, climbed atop a police vehicle, declaring it his new ‘mobile command center.’ He was apprehended without serious incident and is currently undergoing a psychological evaluation.

The big question remains: will this self-proclaimed hero face charges? And more importantly, what brand of super serum was he on? The incident raises interesting questions about vigilantism, mental health, and the potential consequences of taking comic book heroism a little too far. One thing is certain: this is not the Captain America we see in the movies! Stay tuned for updates as this bizarre story unfolds. We’ll be sure to let you know if he manages to escape and form his own team of ‘Avengers’!